Please don't post until the feeds return. Thanks!

They are back Kevin and Natalie they have to win POV.

Jordan putting her bag back in the room.

Natalie bitching about Michele already. Natalie spinning the key around, Kevin says this is the first thing she has won and now she has to win POV. Natalie says she was behind and said they both have to lose so they could tie. Kevin said if one of them had got it right too they would have won.

Jordan putting her clothes up. Putting a black pair of pants under her dress.
Oh it was a shirt and top, she took the shirt off and stil has the red top on. She says OMG I had this the whole time and sprays perfume on.
She goes through the red room.

Kevin bashing Jeff for his back stabbing. It comes down to being a strong competitor. Right.
Natalie says she got Jessie's right.

Michele is doing dishes. Jordan goes to potty.

6:05 pm HT

Apparently Skippy is in horrific shock at the HOH winner, because we currently one of the feeds with Jordan unpacking but with the horrible control room music as audio.

Oh, there we go. Now nothing but sad Jordan unpacking sounds. She puts her black pants on under her dress. She finds something in her bag that surprises her that she had the "whole time".

6:08 pm HT

We follow Jeff into the BR where she continues to finish changing inside of the shower. Skippy inexplicably shifts to a view down the empty hallway. BB tells her to put on her mic.

Michele, still looking very smart in her print dress wanders into the Redrum where Nasty and Kevin are talking and completely ignores them. Nasty scurries away like a roach. Appalled at the scene, Skippy takes us back out to the KT, but sadly Nasty appears there anyway. Jordan and Michele are out there too now, but neither of them say anything to NastyKev.

Jordan gets a pot out of the cupboard and smashes Natalie over the head with it. No wait, that's where I went in my mind. She just put it on the counter. Despite holding back what was undoubtedly her urge, she is called to the DR anyway.

Nasty is now drawing a parallel between having her period and winning HOH competitions. Um, yeah.

G you still got Jeff on your mind.

Michele goes to red room to get stuff out of the drawers and Kevin.Natalie have to change subjects.

Jordan back in the pool room. BB yells at her to put her mic on.

Kevin and Natalie in the kitchen leaving Michele alone in red room.

Well now we get to see if BF is real. Natalie says the bug scene had Russell there so it was old.
Natalie talks about her list of HOH stuff she ordered.

Jordan is doing dishes now too. Michele went to change clothes now.

Natalie is so excited you get to see her boyfriend. She wants them to tell her if they really think he is cute, Natalie will just say he is cutier then Jordan's. BB calls Jordan in.

Natalie tells Kevin I TOLD YOU ON my period, ON my period again and I won. She says she really won 2 HOH's she still claims the one that Jessie got.

They eat junk.
This is going to couple of days till Saturdays POV.

Natalie laughing about the Jessie/Lydia question. she knows they are together.

Kevin says he had no Idea he could not say MO FO. And he gets fish tanked again. He tells her what he said to Julie in the HOH room.

All 4 feeds of Nat and Kev while Jordan is in DR.

He says she asked about Natalie, and the blood on his hands. Kevin says he had no choice.
He had to make this decision and he has to send Jeff home to save him self. Natalie says she gets the blood on her hands this week and it is going to be Epic. Kevin says people won't vote for you if you did not play. Natalie says Memphis did not get blood but Dan played the game. Kevin says that is why Michele is going to win. it is not about like it is about playing.

Natalie has not shut up once, her boyfriend is so cute, she ordered a bunch of crap in her HOH basket. She says a long ass prayer while Kevin shuffles the damn cards. Now she is whispering to kevin that she has to put him up on the block. She is going to win Veto so he has nothing to worry about, she has to cover herself. He is not saying anything.

6:37 pm HT

No recaps? That's because there is nothing happening. Kevin is mindlessly cutting a card deck on two feeds, and the other is a wide shot of the same redrum, with Natalie occasionally whispering something mindless.

Kevin sighs. I wish I could think of some clever joke about Nasty's horrible top, but... feh.

Great, Nasty is STFC.

More silence. Where the heck are the other two? I would rather watch Jordan and/or Michele sleeping than this.

Natalie already thinks she has lost the HOH key, nope in her back pocket.
Kevin says he is so relieved that Jeff is gone.
Now Natalie has the damn cards. Natalie asks if he thought after that speech he had any worries. He said no after she told them no he had no worries. That last speech of Jeff was bad. She had her mind already made up. They still want Michele gone, better odds with Jordan, Jessie told her to stick with her gut don't go back and forth. Kevin says so weird in here now, the house has changed.

I guess Jordan needed a long DR.

Michele comes in and asks what they want for Dinner. Kevin can't think. Michele will make chicken parm, they are both down with that, and Natalie wants to help so she can learn how to make it for her man when she gets home. Kevin will make Mac and cheese. Natalie has never cooked at home and hopes if she can cook he will propose. BF RUN! Michele says no mac and cheese with spaghetti. and They just had mac and cheese last night. Kevin says it was so good. Michele liked Lydia's mac and cheese Natalie did not have any. Natalie says her speciality is tuna.

NataLiar on and on about her HOH, her pictures, her slippers, a electric razor, hates the one they gave them. Kevin and Michele tell her it is lonely up there. They bitch that there was more stuff about Jordan on the live show. Kevin says amazing that they showed them Nat's bug stuff.

Natalie says she freaked out when they said Nat's secret was out. Michele figured they would say she was related to someone. Kevin wonders where the camera that looked down on Nat during the bug. Michele says they are always on the camera now, 4 feeds for each of them. wished I would turn off two.

Michele says she almost changed her vote after Jeff's speech. That was not classy. Kevin makes fun of it about Dad/BF and Jessie and giving her HOH. She got it herself without Jeff.
Michele says she had to keep her word and Nat says she understands she kept hers too,

Natalie says they could not have given her that deal with those questions. Michele says she would have wrote down 0. Kevin says it was because he did not win Veto.

Natalie says it was tempting to hear HOH was hers but she would need a treaty.

Kevin says if Jeff had approached him with stuff; Natalie says then you would have screwed me. Kevin says he would have talked to Natalie first. If she had been ok with it he would have took it up, and Nat says if Kevin was ok with it she is with him to Final 4. IT is a game.

Competition makes good TV says Michele.

I am out; night all.

8pm HT

Feeds just went from fish to trivia.
Must be time for a F4 luxury comp.

8:17PM HT

Still trivia.

I just wanted to add that before trivia, they were at FOTH since about 7:35.

Let the rampant speculation begin.

We know that Natalie is a big cheater, maybe she cheated during the HOH, and they are redoing HOH. Whatever it is, I hope that it sucks for Natalie.

Yeah. That is what I am going with.

8:45pm HT

We are still at trivia.
Just a reminder BBAD starts at 12am ET so the feeds should return then.

8:45PM HT

Still trivia.

Someone on another site suggested a F3 party.

I call bullshit.

I want to see Natalie cry.

8:54PM HT

Back, and it looks like they had a luxury clothes' competition.

Sorry about the one line recap. I don't care, at this time.

8:56pm HT

Feeds back, just one of those F4 clothing luxury comps.
Now they are all trying on clothes.
Real is so board of the F4 the feed stops and I have to start it again.
The house is it's normal boring self.

No surprise, but Natalie has only been complaining about her clothes. It's just not fair. Boo-hoo, you ungrateful bitch.

9:07pm HT BBAD

Q: How do you make BB suck even more then it does already?
A: Have Natalie as HOH.
Yeah I know I said I was done with BB if Natalie won but I'm going to try and recap her as little as possible.
Skippy gave them a bottle of red and white wine.
Jordan is making a pizza.

Switched to the exciting action of Natalie trying on clothes.
Kevin must be in the DR or outside. He's not been on camera yet.
Jordan does some cleaning in the kitchen because you know lazy ass Natalie is not going to do it.
Boring conversation with Natalie and Michele in the red room.

Natalie please put some clothes on already. She's still in a bikini as was Michele when she was trying on clothes.
Now she's talking to her self about the clothing.
I switch to the kitchen.
Jordan drinking white wine. Michele drinking red.

Natalie is going to stay in her bikini for her HOH opening. Ewwwwwwwwwww.
Michele goes back to change.
Jordan sits at the counter drinking her wine.
Skippy does a slow zoom on the photo of Jeff then goes back to Jordan.
Michele and Natalie resume trying on clothing.

BBAD 12:23
Drive by recap:
Jordan seeks solace in a full glass of white wine in the KT, staring at Jeff's black and white photo on the wall. Skippy feels her pain and zooms in on the pic...
Jordan continues contemplating and staring....
She's so sad, nearly in tears. All alone.
Jeff's blue plastic cup still sits atop the counter.

9:44pm HT

Michele, Natalie and Jordan at the kitchen counter.
With Kevin in the DR, Here come the lies from Natalie.
Natalie: I told you yesterday and I'm sticking to it.
Jordan: Told me what?
Natalie tells Jordan and Michele that Kevin is going on the block.
He's a strong competitor.
She lies saying that they only had a deal to the F4.
She claims she will not say anything to Kevin and her nomination speech will be true.
Yeah like I believe that.

Jordan gets cranky had starts talking loudly about the game.
Inside voice people, please stop yelling!

9:58pm HT

It's the BB version of The View.
Women talking way to loud inside and sometimes yelling, except the topic is not current events or presidents but the Big Brother game.
Jordan does not think Russell would vote for her over Kevin in a F2.
She talks about all the things Russell said during the fight after Russell went on the block.
Michele tries to yell Jordan that Russell was just mad then it was not really personal.
More boring rehash of the game.

10:21pm HT

Time for Natalie's HOH room.
Skippy has F3 & 4 on the DR door.
The door opens she comes out.
Natalie: Who wants to see my HOH room?
I don't, I really don't give a shit. I'm done for tonight.
Thanks for making this season suck even more Grodner.

So, Jordan exclaims how Natalie's friend looks so much older than stated age of 18. Several comment on age related issues in pics of Natalie, etc.

Also, pics show Natalie's and her boyfriend in New York, and one other place I forgot, and Kevin and Michele give suspicious looks.

Natalie's letter is from her father, nothing interesting. Make good choices, etc. She thinks it is an old letter.

I think I can't bear to hear her voice anymore. Night.

2:45am HamsterTime
Kevin and Gnat in the HOH smack-talking a recap of last night's show. Seriously, I'm throwing one together, but I swear I'm taking nothing from their point of view.

Kevin is razzing her about the dragonfly freak-out. She says "did I look good in my bikini at least?" I still giggle over B-side's comments on her freak-out....in his captions, it wasn't a dragonfly attacking her but a shower head and soap.

Gnat says that ChenBot was BUSTING UP at Kevin. I recall a giggle from the android, but it wasn't busting up. Gnat goes back to defending herself over the Pandora's box greed session. Gnat claims she asked Jordan to come in, but she was too greedy. Then Kevin mentions Jeff not coming to unlock him, and they both jump on him being the "greedy mo fo". Seriously? You just fucked him over, lied to him, and all but evicted his ass from the point of the VETO ceremony. And they expect him to give up cash to free you? Idiots.

Gnat states she can't believe she came back on that HOH competition and then WON! Nor can we, Mowgli, nor can we.

3:20am HamsterTime
Gnat is alone in the HOH. Kevin has gone off to bed. Gnat puts on the headphones, fumbles with the CD player for over a minute, clicks on the SpyCam (to watch sleeping hammies??), and shuffles the fucking cards.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It's going to be a long HOH week, peeps.

4am HT

A long week, indeed, cops!

Gnatalie played solitaire with the headphones on in her HoH bed. She has propped her pictures (of her dad and boyfriend) up on the bed with pillows, to keep her company.

All quiet in the redrum and splish splash. Gnat gave up on solitaire, and went to bed. FFF of sleeping hammies - worst final four ever!

7:30am HamsterTime
Jordan awakes and heads to the kitchen where she slams some ice cubes into a cup. She heads out into the BY and retrieves some drink from the outdoor fridge. She reenters the house and struts to the bathroom.

Silence again overtakes the BB house.

7:45am Hamster Time
Jordan heads back in the SS room and crawls into bed to try to sleep again. She sits up and chugs the drink she had set by her bedside. Michele asks how she's feeling. Jordan responds "dehydrated". According to the ladies, there was much consumption of beverages of the alcoholic nature by them last evening. Jordan apparently passed out. Michele sobered up when she was called to the DR, then came out and drank some more while sitting in the BY by herself. She jokes that she sat there talking to herself, again, and probably gets a crazy edit.

Michele makes her quest for liquid rehydration. She returns to the room and they stumble toward each other trying to sit together to whisper strategy. Michele says she's going home....they talk of something else, but Jordan is grabbing the bedsheets against her mic, so I can't make out at all what they're saying.

Michele states they just have to win the VETO, because that person decides who goes home. If Gnat wins it, Michele is done. Jordan dogs herself for missing the RONNIE question. It's actually cute to hear Jordan spewing out strategy....granted, it's the strategy that Michele figured out 3 days ago....but still it's a cute attempt.

Jordan explains that she may seem distant today, but she is determined to run through stuff in her mind. She's this season's pet, but clearly not a multi-tasker.

930am HT

Jordan is up. She went into the kitchen, took a couple pills or vitamins, and grabbed a bite to eat. Good hamster the is, she tidies up immediately. She grabbed her drink and went to sit out on sadlly Jeff-free orange couch.

Other hammies still asleep, including Gnat with her picutres propped up on her bed.

Jordan picked her nose. She looks exhausted/hungover, and is playing with her goldilocks.

ETA just as I posted, she was called to the DR. She looks sad enough to cry, so maybe they're going for the sad, breakup, DR.

10:12 am HT

From the posts above it seems that Jordan is in HOH. So what does skippy give us.

Four Fucking Feeds of Skank Gnats pictures.

I start to complain and Michelle comes walking through to the pool room. she pulls out a new blue dress and holds it up. Rather cute. Michelle is going through the new clothes she won. Maybe she'll throw away that godawful miniskirt now.

I think i'll pull a Gnat. I'm not talking to anyone until the get me a new HOH Damnit. Really I'm not.

10:30 AM HT

Michele is up in the BR applying war paint for the Nomination party later today. She is wearing a Tiny little black and white bikini with ties on the side, must be from the comp last night too, I have never seen it. She backs up to the mirror to see her back view. Looks like she has her hair in pig tail braids.

Jordan is out of DR and goes to potty. Jordan says she fell asleep in her bottoms of the bikini and then she went to the DR and fell asleep in there, and Michele says they kept calling her but she does not know where she was.

Fish

Jordan flushes toilet and comes out and washes her hands. Michele goes in to potty next. Jordan looks like she as sitting in sand on the back of her butt. She applies her underarm roll on. Then gets eye boogers out of her eyes. Washes her hands again. Michele out of potty and Jordan says she is going outside, Michele is too. Jordan goes by the kitchen to put a blue glass in the sink, then washes it. Is that the Jeff Memorial cup that he left last night?

Jordan goes to the BY and says hi to Kevin, she said that coffee cup was filled with ants this morning and so she threw it away. She tells him that she went to the DR last night and fell asleep on the couch then went back to bed without ever going to DR. She was completely out of it. She says it was weird. He says it was funny. Michele comes out to take out the trash, Back inside they whisper about Kevin. They wonder if Natalie has told him that he is going up today against Michele. Michele takes out more trash, sadly no Nat in it too.

Michele goes back in and says she is hungry. Kevin sitting alone on the orange couch on the patio. Michele comes back out and asks if he is ok. He says he just woke up. Michele goes looking for sun tan lotion. JOrdan in the pool on the float. Jordan says the sun tan lotion breaks her face out. Michele says you have to put something else on your face.

Jordan on all 4 feeds in the swimming pool without her shadow. Darn.

Michele went in back to the bathroom, and Natalie comes out and asks Kevin if he is ready for today, He is not happy. BB yells for an outside lock down and watchs Michele comes out and wash her hands and back out again, twice in 30 minutes.

Michele outside now with the other 3 and Natalie thinks it will be the mini table.

One feed of the yellow ducky with the sunglasses in the pool next to Jordan. One of the patio with Michele, Natalie and Kevin and 2 of the BY. Kevin teases Natalie about a huge bug. Kevin complains about the ashes out side and Michele laughs about poor Jeff.

I hear sawing in the back ground, let's hope for a great POV tomorrow. (maybe a noose)

Natalie says her HOH was so nice she did not go to bed till 5:30 playing cards. Kevin says what the hell you still woke up on time.

Michele on the patio with Kev and Nat who are not talking, says they are really sawing over there, must going to be a big POV, Michele says maybe an eating comp. Natalie says not with just 4 people and she is safe anyway. Michele teases her about bugs again.

Jordan soaking up sun in the pool with a shirt over face.

Nat expected a lot more butt kissing then this, since that is what she did to all the other HOHs before. she is sitting like an old cow boy too.

Michele gives up on trying to talk to Nat/Kev and goes to the pool with Jordan.

Natalie offers Kevin some of her cereal, he says he will just have his own.
I think the girls got matching bikini's last night in the comp but Jordan fell asleep in hers so she is wearing a red bikini bottom with the black and white top that matches the whole bikini that Michele is wearing now and that Nat had on last night. Today Nat is in red shorts and black tank and her long hair still straight. BB yells at Nat to put on her mic.
I wished they would turn the mic on over the pool.

Kevin lays down and talks about music. Kev wonders if they got Nat Alicia Keys because she looks like her. Nat says on her list too. She says Justin was on top of the list. And we get Fish for a second. Do they have to pay him every time she mentions his name? Kevin asks what her man listens too, she says country and christian, Kevin says you got a real WHITE Boy, does he drive a Ford pickup too, she says no Jeep and they go off roading all the time. It was an old Jeep did not cost as much as her car but he wants to get something else tried of it. Kevin and His Man went looking before he got there too for a jeep.

Lots of airplane flying low today. My son is coming home from SF and I pick him up at 3:30 pm. The other is coming home from Hawaii, wonder if they are in those air planes flying over.

11:15am HT

Gnat is practicing her nomination speech: "Kevin, I nominated you for strategic reasons. Michele I nominated you for personal reasons." Kevin agreed that sounded good, then fish.

I fired up the feeds for nothing, I guess.

Michele and Jordan in the pool floating and sunning no speaking.

Natalie and Kevin get into a spat over 2009 cars coming with air conditioning or not. Kevin says he and his man just went looking and saw them without and Nat says no car made today does not have it. Then they whisper about her speech she will make today during nominations and Kevin says that sounds good.

Fish

Back and they are in the house with the mini table, there was a Natalie 2 season ago that never to to see the mini. Natalie and Kevin argue over it being the lazy susan that was on the old table. Kevin called to DR and Natalie says they want him to talk about the table, he says we have to do the fashion show today too. Natalie is eating her Trix. Michele says that is so F'ing cool about the table. Jordan came in and saw it and then went back out to the pool no big deal to her.

Michele makes her a bagel. Michele says ants every where again, she hates them they suck, all over the butter. Natalie cuts up a banana to put in her trix. Her HOH houses are a little quieter but she still drags her feet.

It wasn't noms, they got THE MINI! They're all excited about it. Kevin thinks it was the lazy susan, but KnowitallNatalie insists it's the wrong size. Kevin was called to the DR; Michele and Gnat putter around the kitchen. Michele laughs that she was looking the memory wall last night pondering that there's nobody left. She found ants in the butter. Yuck.

Gnat is walking around with a banana in her hand. Just when I thought she couldn't possibly look more simian, there she goes!

Michele starts talking how funny the noms will be with just one key. And then notices that Natalie is saying a long prayer over her trix/bananas and says oh sorry. Finally Finished and says it is going to be funny, Michele warns about how awkward it is to carry it from the key room to the table, not heavy.

All four feeds of Nat/Michele in the kitchen I feel like I should be watching Jordan after her drunk last night and for Jeff.

Skippy focuses on the bagel alone on the cabinet and the microwave while Michele sprays the raid, she says they love the storages bags. Should you spray that with people eating near by? I would worry but it is gNat. I hate hearing people hit their teeth with the spoon.

Michele makes her a bagel sandwich with chips and goes outside to get her glass then refills it. Natalie washes her bowl and Michele tells her she will do the dishes. Natalie gets a cup of OJ too. Michele sits at the mini. Natalie says she ate there just to test it out too. It is nice.

Natalie goes outside. Hurry BB cut the feed to Michele eating chips, it is HORRIBLE!

Natalie goes to tell Jordan she still wants a final 2 with her and she is going to give her speech about them. Jordan still going all out on POV because she does not feel safe, after what Kevin did to Jeff. Natalie too is going to win it and going to keep things the way she wants them. Jordan asks if Kevin knows, Natalie LIES that Kevin does not know. Natalie says she hinted to Michele that it was her up against Kevin. Jordan says Michele knows anyway. Jordan is not going to get excited about it and will not jinx herself out of winning.

Natalie is happy she got her HOH and Jordan says all the HOH stuff. Natalie says it is a good week. Jordan says just stressful. She is scared it will be Kevin winning Veto and votes her out. Natalie does not want Michele there. But it could be Kevin this week. Natalie says she wishes she could evict 2, sodo we. Jordan says Kevin will win the jury votes. Natalie reminds her that last year Dan screwed everybody and won. She talks about 10 and 8 ED winning as bad as he was too. But nothing about 9.

Kevin went to lay out but Nat says too hot for her on the period and she does not need a tan anyway, she goes up to HOH to watch spy cam.

Jordan in the pool. Michele laying out. Kevin had enough sun and went to shower.

Lazy day in the BB house.

I am out.

12:27pm

F1 & 2 Jordan and Michele in the pool.
Jordan rehashing her time with Jeff in the house and talk about other game related stuff.

F3 & 4 Kevin doing his post shower routine.

Fished.

12:40pmHT

Oh dear lord, Gnat is practicing her nomination speech in HOH with Kevin. She is bringing new meaning to the word hypocrisy. Here it is, in a nutshell, the shortened version of the speech she has planned:

Kev, you are being put up for strategic reasons.
Mic, you are being put up for personal reasons: you are a big fat liar, you are responsible for Chima's expulsion, yes she threw her microphone in the pool but she did it because of you, you say you are a Christian but you are really the devil, you suck, as my dad said half a million dollars is great but not at any cost, I hate you, good bye.

If you want the real speech, someone over at Jokers did a pretty good verbatim of it in a post at 12:50pm.

The largest part of the speech is about what a big liar Mic is, and not a true Christian because she's such a big fat liar unlike Gnat, herself a Christian, who is honest and has integrity. Seriously. These words are coming out of her big fat lying mouth about Mic being a liar, unlike Gnat, who does not lie (except for game reasons).

They plan how Kev will pretend to be mad at Gnat for nom'ing him. Kev says America will love Jordan because she has a sad poor trailer trash story, and is with Jeff who America loves (not sure why this comes up, maybe a reason why not to take Jordan to F2)?

12:51pm HT

Jordan eats a sandwich and has some chips, sitting on the orange couch.
Michele is still in the pool.

In the HOH Natalie and Kevin discuss more lies they will tell Jordan and Michele. You suck!

1:00PM HT


I can't recap Nat. After the sanctimonious bilge that is coming out of that disgusting trap that she calls a mouth, it would not do my blood pressure good.

So, I'll just recap Jordan who is on the Orange Couch of Where Is My Jeffikins? She looks sad. She is currently drowning her sorrows in a bag of Baked Lays Potato Chips. Careful, girl. You are cute, but Jeff will not want to take Shamu to Hawaii. Mix in a salad or two.

She must have heard me. She just closed up the bag, and walked inside.

She refreshes her drink, and goes to join Michele, who is floating in the pool. Michele recounts her work schedule which pretty much sounds like 364 days a year, including Christmas.

Jordan is appalled.

HEEEE!! I just mooned Natalie on F4.

That'll learn her.

1:05pmHT
Gnat the MonkeyBoy just asked Kevin if she should wear her HOH robe and Kevin's crown duing the nom ceremony. I hope he says no.

1:30pmHT
I got a phone call and come back to discover that she is indeed wearing them, with sunglasses. Practicing her speech again in this outfit. Must go screencap now!

1:37pmHT
Okay, I s'capped that mess. You can go see for yourselves. So, she's basically spend the last 30+ minutes going over and over and over her nom speech again, each time blaming Mic just a little bit more for Chima's demise. Tells her this is for Chima, etc. It really is unbelieable. Flashback to 12:30pm, Cam 3 or 4 and see for yourself. Then keep watching at 1pm.

Now they are sitting on the bed eating and laughing and planning Kev's reaction to the speech. Meanwhile, the two sane hammies are floating in the pool, chit chatting and not talking game.

1:34pm HT

Jordan is back in the pool with Michele.
Natalie the annoying twit looks like a total clown waring the HOH robe, a crown and sunglasses.

Fished. Thanks morons in the HOH room.

1:55PM HT

I just wanted to add to Sophy and Ice's fine recaps, that she will be using the pool bridge as a scepter. She calls it a staff, which is what shepherd's use to tend to goats like Natalie, but it's a scepter.

I hope she uses a billiard ball as an orb. That would effing rock.

What a pompous buffoon. How will Michele, Jordan and even Kevin prevent themselves from laughing in her face?

2:49PM HT

Skippy has FFF on Stinky and the Lame in the HOH. They are discussing all of the times that the DR has prevented them from pranking Michele. One of the latest ideas was that they were going to steal her contact lens solution.

That's not funny, you twats. That's cruel.

Then Kevin thinks of ways to screw with Michele including sleeping in the same room, and getting up to go pee all the time, so that he can slam the door. Of course, the Einstein finally realizes that this would mean that he would get no sleep.

Next up, he considers reprising Evel DICK!s Pots and Pans Concerto in B Minor, and are so unbelievably fucking deluded to think that they are "Evel DICK!ing" Michele.

Um idiots? I knew Evel DICK! I recapped Evel DICK! You two are no Evel DICK! You are rank amateurs. (And with Stinky, the emphasis is on the word "rank.")

Finally Skippy gives me a break, and sends me to Michele and Jordan.