"BB22: The Movie" - Choose the cast and plot

[Tsylyst]

If there was going to be a movie about BB22, tell us who would be cast in some of the lead roles and give us a one-sentence summary of the plot!

[MrsGryn]

Greg Kinnear as Memphis. A story about a Mempa who goes to be early and crabs about these damn kids leaving their stuff all over the house, until one day he just disappears forever. 

[shopnfoo]

Lindsay Lohan stars in "A Christmas Story (No, Not That One)".  It is the Lifetime biopic of the bloody rampage Christmas goes on after she leaves the BB house where she seeks retribution on all those she feels wronged her, so basically everyone in the house.  Ian Somerhalder plays Cody, Bobby Cannavale plays Enzo, an unknown blond actress with a botched nose job plays Nicole.