Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
MrsGryn

Survivor 38 - Episode 2 - Everything Is Funny When You Are Winning

Recommended Posts

MrsGryn   

Here we are again, even though we can still barely tell Julia from Julie. In case you forgot, Reem mom’d her way to be the first person voted off the island last week. This week we start with her on the Edge of Extinction, realizing that she literally has nothing…except flint, a machete, a tarp, coconuts, and an emergency beacon in case she decides to tap out. She also has her fear of disappointing her children to keep her company. Reem Daly is totally getting the winner’s edit.

Manu beach, aka the blue buff tribe. Everyone is marveling at their waterlogged hands and yuck! Those things are wrinkled. They look like shriveled up albino eels. Anyway, Rick, who is built like a morning news anchor and should not be shirtless on my TV, talks to Wendy about her ally getting the boot. Wendy immediately pitches that Kelley Wentworth should be the one going as this is her third time out and she’s an excellent player, even though most of us can barely remember who she is much of the time. When Lauren later waxes poetic about how her two favorite players are Parvarti and Kelley, I honestly had to think for a moment…oh, she means the Kelley on this season. I just don’t get it. Meanwhile, Kelley sees Wendy talking with David and Rick and declares how she does not trust Wendy (even though she understands her position, having been there done that in the past). Wentworth suggests an open Idol hunt. That is honestly not a bad idea, because everyone knows everyone is out hunting for idols. Why be put out about it or have to sneak around when it’s just an open secret? Just have a melee for a few hours, then come back to camp and do camp stuff. Everybody wins, especially the one who finds the idol. Who, as it turns out to be, is Lauren. Yay, a girl found the idol!  That will help with the statistics on men vs. women finding idols.

Kama beach finds Ron leading the tribe in a game of Dance Dance Revolution. He insists they have a tribal dance for the next Immunity challenge. Basically it is a rip off of the E-A-G-L-E-S, Eagles! football team chant, but it’s goofy and funny and Ron has no compunction about coming across as a silly showoff in front of everyone. They all laugh and enjoy themselves, because as we all know everything is funny when you’re winning. Speaking of funny, Aubry sinks her own ship on Kama as she starts her patented “I really like you, let’s be allies” attempts on various tribe members. First she stupidly asks Victoria (Freckles) and Julia how they feel about returning players and seriously? What are they supposed to say? “We’re gonna vote you out first opportunity.” I mean…come on. I really think Aubry was screwed on her first season out of the win on Kaon Rong because Michele was a pretty cry-er, but I’ve really disliked her gameplay since then. This opinion is not likely to change from what we have seen so far. So Freckles and Julia give vague non-answers, but that annoys Aubry when she later tells us how frustrated she is that the new players aren’t spilling their guts to her. Freckles talks to Ron and Julia about it, and come to find out Ron has an Aubry story, too! She told him that they really like him and as it turns out, she said the same thing to Freckles and Julia! Aubry really needs to change up her game because she went to several people, per Julia, and used those key phrases like, “I want have an open dialog” and “You remind me of me as a player” and “I think we get along.” We get a segment of Aubry telling people exactly what the girls just said many times over. Nice job, editors!

Sidenote: I know Generation Z is full of whimsy and all, but WTF is Freckles doing wearing a woolen knit cap on a tropical island? She’s already the second palest player in Survivor history (that honor will always belong to Cochran). Too much heat and she might spontaneously combust.

Parrot! I bet gforce could tell us exactly what the genus and species is of this bright green fellow.

Manu beach shows us entirely too much of Dadbod Rick aka Jared from Subway. That nickname disturbs me so Rick might just have to be Dadbod Rick from now on. He and David have taken to each other like ducks to bread in the water. Yes, it’s a slightly tortured analogy but you’ll live through it. They discuss more with Wendy about voting out Kelley, but David is smart about how to engineer a blindside. They agree they could go to the end together and Rick promises to keep David until there are four people left and then cut his throat. They giggle and it is seriously adorable. Crap, now I have people I’m rooting for in the game. Dammit.

Julie and Freckles are gathering more palm fronds and doing work around the camp, but they talk about how the men are out for hours and they know they are looking for idols. Freckles even says to us later that she knows there are idols and advantages out there, and they are usually found in funky looking trees but she has no idea how to even begin looking for them. Julie does a little rant about men always being the ones to find idols and women less so, since the men were the hunters and gatherers or wait the women were the gatherers or wait who were the gatherers? Ugh.  But then Julie declares that looking for an idol seems sneaky and she goes back to camp to work around there. DOUBLE UGH!

Immunity Challenge! Probst is wearing a Valspar Paint Bubbling Fountain shirt, for those keeping score at home. Not only is this challenge for immunity, it is also for a reward. There is a choice! Option one is a variety of spices, a couple of kitchen knives and a cutting board. Since they like to torture people, it is probably one of those awful glass cutting boards that make me want to hurt whoever invented tempered glass when I am forced to use one. The other, and only sensible option, is for a deluxe set of fishing gear. When Manu comes in, no one is too surprised Reem was voted out, mostly because they probably can’t remember her. Anyway, the challenge itself is a repeat: start on a platform in the ocean and swim to a large bamboo cage. Everyone has to get up and over the cage and once they are all trapped, they have to untie the jumbo sized snake in the cage, and no that is not an analogy as to what Joe has in his pants. The very heavy snake – again, we aren’t talking about Joe here – must then be hoisted up and over the cage walls and carried ashore, then place on a long wooden table. The snake has six discs inside that need to found. Those discs have numbers on them and that will lead to a combinaion for a lock to open and retrieve rings, which will then be used to toss onto oars that spell out the word IMMUNITY. I’m tired just writing that out. Kama sits out Julie as they have an extra player. Survivors ready? GO!

As it turns out, Wendy is like Ozzy in the water: she swims like a fish and is first to the cage. Unfotunately, Keith is on Manu and his lack of experience causes Chris to stay back and help him get to the cage. An advantage for Kama, too, is they have Helloooooooo Eric the firefighter. Unsurprisingly, he is excellent as maneuvering very heavy object from one place to another and Kama gets their snake up, over and on the beach father than Manu. In the end, though, once the rings start getting tossed, the tribes are tied up at one apiece. Ring tossing by Chris on Manu goes well but he taps out with Keith, who does not have any success with the rings, while Joe and Eric keep flipping oars until they are down to one left while Manu still has five to go. Eric wins and Kama jumps around in a circle, chanting their tribe name. Annoying pricks.

Post challenge, the Manu tribe is down in the dumps because they lost again. Chris apologizes, but everyone, including Keith, knows it was his poor swimming and lack of ring-tossing skills that helped get them in this pickle. Keith is certain he is vulnerable. I have to say this about him: being a poor swimmer but still getting out there in the ocean and trying, much less jumping from a very tall cage down into the water is still pretty damn brave, so he gets all kinds of kudos from me for just getting out there and doing it. Poor swimming skills in a pool is hard enough. In an ocean…with FISH? Scary shit. But you should at least be able to toss some rings onto pegs once you are on land!

The plot, however, to get out Kelley Wentworth is still afoot. Keith goes to Rick and tells him he will be loyal to the very end throughout the whole game. So, funny enough, Chris goes to Dadbod Rick and independently brings up getting rid of Kelley. Rick LOVES it and runs to David. They are way too happy and think this will be smooth sailing, so we know immediately that Kelley is not going. Warthog is on the warpath for Keith leaving, so there is no swaying him at all, though Chris makes an attempt. He tells Warthog that Kelley will only use them until she doesn’t need them anymore, and dude…that’s the whole point of the game. The difference is that Warthog thinks of the women on the tribe as “the females” and only in terms of their physical abilities. I just can’t with this doofus.

Tribal Council. Probst is wearing a Valspar Paint Blue China shirt, for those keeping score at home. I really love this set! Behind Probst is a large war canoe. Nice atmospherics! Keep an eye on this set and tell me what you spot. Anyway, we have some standard tribal council chitchat to get through. Probst starts with Wendy, who has been much less full of tics now that she has settled down a bit. There is talk about how it feels to see your name among the votes. Conclusion: not great. Talk pivots to keeping the tribe strong in order to not lose again. Keith, when called out on his incompetent performance, brings the only argument he really has going for him, which is that if there is a tribe swap, there are people who will flip and you want someone who will be loyal. There is talk that it will be a blindside tonight, which Probst LOVES, and Dadbod Rick earns a laugh when he says, “Who doesn’t want to check blindside off their Survivor to-do list? Notch the tree, get water from the well, do a blindside.”

Okay, I freaked out for a minute. Probst kept calling Dadbod Rick “Devin” and I momentarily panicked that I had the wrong name for him, but yeah it was just calling Rick by his last name, “Devens.” Stop that, Probst. It’s not like there is another Rick on the tribe with whom he can be mistaken. You are making extra work for me and it’s a work night. Let’s just get to the vote.

Probst goes to tally the votes. Kelly. Keith. Wendy. Keith. Keith. Keith. With that, it’s enough and Keith is voted out. The young man loses any good credit he had with me by continually moaning, “Oh. For real! Wow. Wow. Wow. And y’all think you are still going to win challenges? Dang. Dang Dang. Dang it. Arrrgh!” followed by lots of sighing and more dangs. Then he comes to the end of the path and reads the signs. So now he has to make a decision and he waffles back and forth. He starts praying and now his mantra is “Come on God! Come on Jesus! Come on God” over and over and we are stranded there as we do not see what decision he makes. Apparently we have to wait until next week.

So the question is…does he join Reem on her lonely spit of sand? Or will he be ferried to another island to wait out his exile alone? Alternately, will he tap out and go get a cheeseburger? Because God left him a light and he is totally ignoring it. That happens a lot.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Jade   

As usual, so much better than the actual show! But, Keith annoys me. Where does Survivor keep finding all of these people who don't know how to swim? Swimming is not even a remotely challenging skill to pick up... at all. If you spend over 5 minutes in the water, magic happens. You can swim. He's been stranded on a beach for days... the perfect place to practice.

I'm starting to think they deliberately stunt cast one wacky "non-swimmer" character who refuses to even try to learn to swim at least once every other season.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
gforce   

I actually am not sure what species of parrot that is, but I think it’s some kind of lory. 

I have to disagree that swimmin is not a challenging skill to pick up.  I tried for years to learn to swim better - taking lessons and practicing for many hours.  I’m still only at the level where I can save myself in the water, but I would not consider myself a strong swimmer at all.  That said, I know that I would never apply to Survivor because of that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
tlh9   

Yeah, swimming can be difficult -- especially, as g said, in open water where there's not necessarily a "bottom".

However, much like one would think that you would make it a point to learn to drive a stick-shift before going on TAR..... one would think you would put some serious effort into learning to swim -- and/or improving your swimming -- before going on Survivor!

Again..... I loved the recap and thank you so much for doing these!  I look forward to every one.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×