Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  

Survivor 36 - 3/7/18 - Revenge of the Blackfish

Recommended Posts


Look, I’m going to be straight with you. Every time Probst does this damn tribal switch up, all it means is more work for me. Now I’ve got to spend extra time figuring out who landed on which tribe, change their names on their threads here at HT, and I STILL don’t know which one is Libby and which one is Angela. Plus there is apparently a Chelsea on this show and the only evidence is her picture from the CBS website. I suspect that picture was a photochop challenge submitted by Redditors.

We start out at the Malolo camp post-tribal. James still hates himself for failing the challenge. I’m sure he will totally learn this lesson and rock the next one. The one thing Malolo can agree on, besides that the tribe is fifty percent less neurotic now that Broke Seth Rogan is gone, is that they are tired of losing. Oh, Indistinguishable-In-Night-Vision-Blonde-Girl, there is going to be a LOT more of that before the season is over. Make yourself comfortable.

Or don’t. Morning of Day Seven, the tribes converge on the beach as Probst, wearing Sherwin-Williams Rivulet Path shirt, for those keeping score at home, greets them. They see Jacob is gone and then Donathan returns and he doesn’t give two shits about Jacob being gone. Probst, enjoying this moment, questions both tribes about how are feeling about each other and of course they answer in the affirmative, kumbayah and all that harmonic shit. Don’t get used to your unity, because Jeff then utters those words that strike fear in the heart of your humble correspondent: “Drop. Your. Buffs.” Arrrgh! Everyone groans and Angela is on the verge…no, she actually does get tears. She explains that she feels they are a family. NO! No, just stop that. This is just a tarted-up game show, lady. NOT your family. Angela does explain later that she was in the army and thus is used to getting really close really quickly with people. Alright, you get this one but don’t let it happen again. Eyes on the objective, Captain Survivor.

Buff draw ends up thusly, with the old tribe letter following their name:

New Malolo (orange):

Stephanie(M), Jenna(M), Brendan(M), Michael(M), Desiree(N), SeaBass(N), Kellyn(N), Bradley(N), Chelsea(N).

New Naviti (purple):

Domenick(N), Morgan(N), James(M), Donathan(M), Laurel(M),  Wendell(N),  Chris(N), Libby(M), Angela(N).

Interesting that the spread was actually about as even as you could get in a ten and eight person mix up. Of course Old Naviti is the dominant on each tribe, but it is close enough that some switching may happen if the Old Malolo members can work some magic. I suspect only Stephanie might be capable of managing that feat.

On the new Malolo tribe there are a couple of funny moments as SeaBass decides he is just going to smile and laugh and go along with it, or as he puts it, he’s a “Laffy Taffy…banana flavored” since he is in the majority. Kellyn has my favorite analogy used so far in that she likens seeing the Malolo beach to meeting a new friend’s ugly baby. You know your friend loves that baby with everything they’ve got, but to you it is one wart short of Quasimodo. In fairness, Naviti has the better beach and they have a construction contractor in Domenick. Speaking of which, at said Naviti camp, Wendell asserts that his tribe won’t be going to trial any time soon, if only for all the creature comforts the new tribe members will enjoy.  If only Chris could relax enough to enjoy being in the majority. He cannot, however, as the paranoia about Domenick and his fake-not-fake idol starts to rot his brain. Chris’s main ally is Angela the former army captain who thinks this is a family camping trip, and he has a direct chat with her about getting her head in the game. He tells her about Dom’s idol and says they need to change their gameplan. Interestingly, being ordered around does not sit well with Angela and she is at least aware that Chris is trying to manipulate her. We also see him talk with James and Libby, both former Malolo, about Dom’s idol and how he needs to go. Libby, for one, is SHOCKED that there is a game of some sort going on at the Naviti camp. Maybe that’s why Malolo kept losing the challenges, Libster.

Meanwhile, over at the Malolo camp Stephanie and Kellyn enjoy a beautiful sunrise, while Bradley complains loudly about how awful the camp is compared to Naviti. Then at the well, Kellyn outright tells Stephanie and Jenna that old Naviti is going to vote out Malolo people, sorry about your luck. This motivates Stephanie, Jenna, Michael, and Brendan to get out and search for an immunity idol. We see the four of them out searching and searching and finally Michael find one of the idols that James in Survivor: China found. He went home with two of them in his pocket. If you weren’t watching back then or don’t remember, the idol is a large square wooden carving that had been tacked up over the camp. It’s pretty huge compared to the standard shell-on-a-chain idol. I mean, where are you going to store that thing? (Text from Tsy: “You could lose it in Chris’ ego”) Anyway, what intrigues me about it is that James went home with two. Are there two hidden out there or is it just the one? I would keep looking. You can’t put anything past these sneaky Survivor producers.

Back to Naviti beach. Dom and Morgan, who is listed as a “Marine animal trainer” have a conversation about getting rid of Chris. They decide to rope in Libby and James, and Morgan works on Libby. The two blondes bond over both of them being Catholic, which okay. I might have gone with the blonde thing, but whatever works for you.

Immunity challenge time! Probst is wearing a S-W Blue Plate shirt, for those keeping score at home. Tribes are going to parkour through a series of ramp walls (seriously, jumping from side to side on slanted walls. It looks AWESOME!), to a sand pit. They will then dig up a ladder, climb it and retrieve a rope with a big ball on one end. They will then use the rope-ball to get the tribes to the top of a tall tower where they will solve a puzzle. In addition to immunity, the winning tribe will also win a tarp and of course send a member from the losing tribe to Ghost Island. Suvivors ready? GO!

As expected the parkour part is really cool to watch. Funny part? James once again cannot do something physical while Donathan manages to sail through it on the first try. Seriously, this guy is a sleeper agent or something. Also, in fairness, James is slightly shorter than most of the rest of them. Now I’m making excuses for him so his ego doesn’t suffer permanent damage. Malolo finishes first and gets their ladder out first. Probst calls out Malolo for being unable to figure out how a ladder works and their confusion gives Naviti time to catch up and pass them by getting the rope free first. Chris works on getting the rope ball up on the hook and Naviti starts ascending the tall tower. SeaBass does it for Malolo and basically the tribes are even. The next part of the tall tower has no help getting to the top other than taking a run and leap approach. Domenick gets up with a boost for Naviti and SeaBass makes it up for Malolo, while both men help the rest of the their tribe up, except for Chris to manages to go all alpha and run up a vertical wall by himself. Well, him and his booty shorts. Helloooooooo Chris and Chris’ Ego. Next step is puzzle time. We have Laurel and Wendell for Naviti, Kellyn and Bradley for Malolo. The puzzle is a three-D type with holes and posts to fit together. At one point, Jeff calls out that Wendell and Laurel are falling behind, and Wendell snaps, “Don’t say that, Probst.” Jeff claps back at him and says, “Just calling what I see.” HA! Puzzle solving goes on and Malolo essentially smokes Naviti, although Kellyn does a premature celebration which bugs the crap out of me. I yell at the TV pretty much all the way through NFL season for this kind of behavior. Wait until Probst tells you that your tribe won the challenge, Kellyn. Something may be wrong with it!

But it isn’t Malolo wins and has to send one member of Naviti to Spooky Island. Probst explains that if Malolo cannot agree unanimously on which Naviti tribe member to send, then Naviti gets to pull rocks. Malolo puts their heads together to try and pick one. Old Naviti wants to send Donathan but Stephanie dissents immediately. Probst asks why they cannot come to a simple agreement and Bradley clearly explains, with no animosity, that Old Malolo doesn’t want to send one of their members for a numerical disadvantage. Rocks it is, and thus Domenick’s target of Chris gets lucky and picks the white rock. He will be safe from Tribal Council. This makes the new Naviti an even number with four Old Malolo and four Old Naviti. There is going to need to be some scrambling. Morgan is worried something is going to get messed up since this season is all about past mistakes. Hey, Orca trainer, doesn’t mean you won’t be making brand new mistakes.

Chris on Ghost Island is worried Dom won’t be voted out at the tribal. He smashes an urn and wins nothing, and now he has nothing but time to think about everything. We get an insight into the human side of Chris. His mom was diagnosed with MS at a very young age, twenty seven, and she has been failing quickly. He spends a good bit of time weeping, so let’s leave the man to his sorrow and get back to something that I can make fun of without feeling like a heel.

Naviti, coming back from the challenge. Angela tells us she had decided to stick with Naviti generally and not do what Chris wanted. She decides she is staying strong for her team. Wendell talks to her and listens, but he finds it sketchy and he turns his target sights on her instead. Talking to Morgan, they hash out a plan to bring in Libby and James and vote out Angela for the sin of being friendly with Chris. Morgan is thrilled because she feels closer to her fellow blonde Catholic girl, Libby, than she does with Angela, who is probably Episcopalian and therefore automatically untrustworthy. Domenick has a fear that the Old Malolo might go after him, so he takes them aside and tells them about how Chris had it in for him since Day One. He shows them the fake idol he made and tells them the story about how he made it to fool Chris into thinking he has a real one. Once he finishes, he assures James, Libby, Donathan, and Laurel that he is one hundred percent on their side and he swears on his children. Luckily, James is slightly better at reading people than he is at physical challenges and sees right through Dom’s bullshit. He in fact calls Dom a Hantz 2.0. James points out to his old tribemates that anyone who swears on his kids that it is a bad sign. He suggests they vote out Morgan instead, but Libby is not happy with that idea, having just bonded with Morgan as someone she can trust. James rightly insists that they need to all have the same target once they get to tribal council, but Libby thinks it would just be easier to vote out Angela.

Tribal Council time. Probst is wearing a S-W Right As Rain shirt, for those keeping score at home. Probst starts with Morgan who claims that the tribes are staying strong to old alliances. Wendell says that the tribes were each in their own spots making plans, and Probst asks him how you can pull someone over to vote with you if everyone is in separate groups. Wendell scratches his head like Stan Laurel and says, “Good question.” He has no answer other than to go talk to someone. Brilliant. Dom claims he talked to people to find out where they were, while Angela says she is still on the fence about sticking with the group decision or making a decision that might be better for her interests. She claims she felt a lot of pressure and Domenick, sitting behind her, has his eyes popping and his head bobbing at her declarations. He claims he is stunned…STUNNED y’all!...that she felt any pressure. She explains that once the tribe swap happened, Chris tried to pull Malolo over and there was pressure there. Morgan has no patience for this and pipes up that Chris is not there so whatever. Angela gives her a look and says simply, “Yes, I know.” This causes Morgan and her shockingly white teeth to turn to Probst and give him a look that says, see what I’ve been dealing with here? Her body language can barely contain her impatience to be rid of Angela. However, she claims the Old Naviti has great relationships. Domenick double downs on that sentiment and it sounds rehearsed and false. Probst says it seems the Old Naviti claims they are tight, but every time he asks questions it sounds like nothing could be further from the truth. Morgan claims they could be telling the truth or they could be great actors but only time will tell. Libby smiles after Probst brings her into it and she sweetly says this is a game where sometimes you have to lie, even if you don’t like it. Morgan, not believing for a moment that Libby would lie to her, makes a big deal that everyone could lie, including the innocent looking Libby, but she looks so sweet, why wouldn’t you trust her? Wendell just wants the tribe to be stronger after the vote is over. Well, of course he does because he thinks the vote is going his way. Shall we find out?

Probst goes to tally the votes. Libby. Angela. Angela. Angela. Morgan. Morgan. Morgan. Morgan. And with that, the Killer Whale trainer from Florida is voted out. Domenick is shocked, Angela is shocked. Morgan is not happy and stares daggers at Libby, saying, “Do not trust the cute blondes.” Oh, Angela, If only you had been around to tell me that earlier in life.

So the votes broke down thusly: Angela was the lone vote for Libby. Morgan, Domenick, and Wendell voted for Angela. The four Old Malolo, James, Donathan, Laurel, and Libby, stuck together and voted out Morgan. Speaking of whom, she still has the legacy idol that was willed to her by Jacob, and now it is her turn to will it to someone else. Of course she picks the one person I want to get booted out: Domenick. This goomba is going to have nine lives in this game.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this