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melesurgo

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About melesurgo

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  1. snarkhilda hisses at the unfortunate soul who happens to be walking by." If this famewhore is still here in 5 seconds you will all be buzzed and banged out of this party!" The next poster must use a song lyric
  2. I had too much wine and kinda wish there was a "like" button
  3. How about Spencer who keeps calling women c*nts?
  4. Previously on the Amazing Race; one of the twinnies says she might scream the entire race, Yay for us. And they tell us how obnoxious Ryan is, which I totally agree with. Brent gets up close and personal with some dehydration, and the goat farmers came in last but it was a non-elimination leg. So let’s get to it shall we? I don’t really get the connection between ex-racers and The Life of Pi so I’m just going to skip over those I hope you all don’t mind. The rockers are leaving first flying to Istanbul, Turkey. Abby and Ryan leave bitching about how horrible it is there. The Twinnies leave next and they all seem to be going to a travel agency. Monster truckers leave hours later it seems and Rob gets all demanding about grabbing a newer car. Hee! He interviews about his internal drive, but I don’t know, I never sense any urgency from these two. At the travel agency teams are showing up and it seems like they will all be on the same flight. Ryan’s nasty side starts to come out as he insults not only the other racers but the whole country too. Jerk. Oh man, rockers dropped some cash, one of the twins picks it up, Trey and Lexie seem to at least struggle with whether or not they should give it back, but twinnies just keep shushing them and say they will split it. It was 100 bucks! Yikes that’s a lot of cash. They think it fell out in the taxi and now have to beg in all this poverty and aren’t too thrilled with that idea. Wow I don’t even think I could bring myself to do that even for a million dollars. But it works out for them and they are super grateful. All teams land in Istanbul. They have to choose between a taxi and the metro to get to a ferry station and only the Chippendales and monster truckers choose metro. Uh oh. Oh cool they have to cross the water that connects Asia and Europe. Rockers on first ferry alone. Twinnies, Abby & Ryan, and the goat farmers all get on one and feel sorry for chippies and truckers. Yeah sure. Meanwhile chippies are talking to a local who tells them a taxi would be faster because it is early and no traffic so they actually jump off. Truckers say they jumped because they are just followers but they will go their own way. Foreshadowing? After the ferry ride they grab clues that send them to a spice bazaar in this order; rockers, Trey & Lexie, goat farmers, Abby & Ryan then the twinnies. Chippies just getting on the ferry and monster truckers still on metro saying nobody could have been as fast as them. So clueless. At stall 14 there is a speed bump for goat farmers and a detour. Scrub it or Simit. In simit they count out and figure out how to balance what looks like bagels on a tray on their head and deliver to three different places. That could be confusing. In scrub it they have to pick up bath items and take to a Turkish bath house and get the crap scrubbed out of them hahaha. That seems like it would be sooo much easier. Everyone picks scrub while Josh and Brent start their speed bump. They have to find a marked vender and eat some ice cream. Wow tough. Well it wouldn’t be if they weren’t so terrible at finding things, as they run around and miss the cart with the marker on it. So they just run up to the first cart they see and order. The funny part is the vender doesn’t just give them their scoops, he messes around juggling and grabbing it back and it’s pretty cute but you can tell they are thinking “just give me the damn cone”. So they eat and say what a great speed bump it is. Currently just getting on the ferry are the monster truckers. Josh and Brent go to get their clue but the guy says no and they figure out what they did wrong and go in search of the right vender. At the bath house the rockers, twinnies, Abby and Ryan, Trey and Lexie get scrubbed up and pretty much enjoy it. Josh and Brent don’t enjoy their second cones quite as much ha! The Chippies reach stall 14 and pick scrub saying how much they need to be clean. For some reason the goat farmers pick Simit. They get the bagels stacked all nicely and put them on Brent’s head as he says it is nice and flat and Josh says no brain. Not nice lol. Right away Josh is getting directions from a guy who is not only not speaking English but talking really really fast. Brent calls him out. Hey look, the monster truckers finally made it to stall 14 and choose Simit too. I just don’t get it. Maybe they are super ticklish? Personally I don’t like people touching me but it still seems scrub would be so much faster. We are treated to some scenes of what looks like some deep muscle massaging and pounding the shit out of some feet but everyone seems to come through OK, AND they do look squeaky clean. Chippies get to scrub as top 4 teams are basically leaving to get their next clue at another bazaar. I guess that’s like having a mall on every corner like we do where I live. Goat farmers are struggling with finding delivery spots and poor Brent gets laughed at. Monster truckers get to bakery and Rob dances a little before he gets bagels on his head. See, no urgency. I wonder if they can’t grab locals to go with them like they used to in the good old days, because Josh and Brent could use one right about now. Roadblock; they have to wear this type of spouted tea-pot and serve 40 glasses of something considered the world’s first soft drink. Now we know who to blame for childhood obesity! They have to earn 40 lira, around 20 bucks to get their next clue. Lexie takes is, as does Ryan. Abba takes it for the rockers thinking it shouldn’t be too hard on his bad knees. Thanks you editors for not forgetting about the chippies with their clothes off! They finish their scrub as the goat farmers have 1 delivery out of 3 complete. They pass monster truckers and tell them where to go. Why? Natalie takes roadblock for the twinnies because she is single and sis tells her to put her sexy on. Ryan thinks he’s a genius for getting a local to help sell to his friends like he is Donald Trump all of a sudden. Lexie thinks being a cheerleader is helping her be loud and obnoxious. Well…yes. Everybody selling. Trey finishes first and Nadyia tells us she rather it is them than Abby and Ryan which Abby overhears. Oops Trey and Lexie on way to the pit stop by taxi. Ryan finishes up and Abby tells him what she overheard and he says twinnies can suck it lol. Goat Farmers finish selling bagels in 6th place with monster truckers’ right behind. Back to selling and twinnies finish up in 4th place with Chippies still there. Trey and Lexie at the pit stop first and win a trip to Australia. I’m jealous but I really like them. They are nice to each other. Abby & Ryan check in at #2. Brent takes selling the soft drinks and Jaymes (I think) freaks out when he sees them and the monster truckers. He says when you see them and the Beekman Boys you know u in trouble heh! Kelley takes the task. James is having a hard time while his buddy sweats it out. He finally starts selling to the ladies and it is working great. Well I would have bought one. They finish in 5th. James and Abba check in at the mat, they are team #3. Hobbled but not out. Twinnies come in 4th and say no more nice twinnies. Huh? Didn’t they just steal somebodies money and then split it so they could share the guilt 50/50. No self-awareness but I love their toughness and energy. Goat farmers leave the task as Rob notes they are the last ones there and hasn’t seen Kelly in a while. She finishes up and they take off. Goat farmers jump out of their taxi to direct traffic and get it moving. Chippendales check in as team #5. Josh and Brent in the taxi getting ready for a foot race with the monster truckers. Rob berates his driver a little but then I forgive him when he leans over and gives his wife a kiss on the cheek. Very Sweet. Goat farmers run up to the mat. They can’t believe it when Phil tells them they are team #6. Here come Rob and Kelly. Phil eliminates them and they take it well. Rob gives his wife all the kudos and redeems himself totally in my eyes. Man that was hard. Whew, I don’t think I will do that again. Thank you recappers, you are awesome!
  5. Thank you, it was my first time and I was TERRIFIED! It is so much harder than I thought and have mad respect now for all you recappers!
  6. Previously on survivor; We finally got to see some dynamics on tribes not named Matsing, but alas, nothing comes of it as the Ulonging continues and Russell gets the boot. Dangit, cuz we got some delusional Abi going on, and some good old fashioned boys vs. girls over at Kalabaw. Night ten Back from tribal and its brrrr cold. Malcolm shares how he thought he would be down to two on day 39 not day 10. I guess he hasn't watched the last seasons where there is a final three. Day 11 Denise and Malcolm figure this might be their last chance to find the idol since there is probably going to be a shake up and they might not be back to their camp. They have nothing else to do and don’t have to hide the fact that they are looking from anybody so eventually Malcolm finds it. Denise knows it will only help her if they end up on the same tribe. Not just a hat rack that one. Reward challenge. Yay! How I have missed the separate challenges. Malcolm and Denise drop their buffs and pull one out of a bag. Malcolm gets Tandang and Denise goes to Kalabaw. Jeff pipes in that it’s like they are starting over. No shit. They have to square off one on one, each holding an idol in one hand on a round platform. First to knock the others off wins a point. First tribe to 5 points wins coffee, tea, biscuits, and cookies; in other words a sugar rush. Yum looks good to me right now because I'm dieting! Pretty boring challenge to watch; basically whoever lunges first or has a longer reach wins. A couple of the guys try tossing their own up in the air and knocking the other straight to the ground so that it hits first which ends up to be a pretty good move. The only excitement came when Abi and Dawson squared off and Dawson grabbed Abi’s hair and Abi whined to her tribe and then Jeff about it and told Dawson to “fight like a man not a bitch” He! An insult to us bitches everywhere. Back at Tandang Malcolm is pretty happy to have won something and says he’s got his swag back. Well yeah, everyone is kissing his ass pretty hard. Pete even spills the beans about him and Abi having the idol. RC is bummed when she sees him and Pete bonding and after sharing with us how she was bullied in school decides flirting is the way to go. I guess that’s better than fisticuffs especially if she fights like a bitch. Skupin seems to be in trouble now since Pete thinks Malcolm is not only stronger but probably not as stupid. Over at Kalabaw Denise is probably not quite as happy as Malcolm since she doesn’t have the idol but tells her new tribe she loves the vibe there and will do anything they need. Katie shares with us that she was glad it was Denise and not Malcolm so they can add to the girl alliance they got going on and that it is her job to get Denise under her arm. Oops, guess her arm might be big enough but more on that later. The really big news is that Dana is sick, shaking throwing up, stomach pains. Medical is called in and basically says it isn’t life threatening they can wait another 12 hours and reassess so Jeff leaves it up to Dana. She is in pretty bad shape and decides to go. Everyone is bummed (not) but not everyone is screwed (Katie and Dawson). Immunity challenge They will race through a series of obstacles, untie knots to release a drawbridge, one person chops through a rope to release bamboo puzzle pieces with letters on them and then they all use them to solve a word phrase. Abi volunteers to sit out and Jeff gives her shit. Normally that would piss me off but I’m not a fan of the crazy so ha! Off they go, Katie right away struggles up the mud hill and now Jeff IS pissing me off because he is like a dog with a bone, just won’t let go of the Katie hate. Untying the ropes Denise does awesome and Kalabaw makes up some time but Tandang is through first, Malcolm chopping through the rope although it looks like a piece of wood to me, and they are solving their puzzle. Finally Jeff is chopping for Kalabaw. Oh I see, the rope is underneath the wood, dang that looks pretty hard. Penner takes over when Jeff slows down and now both teams are solving. Watching the puzzle solving is riveting as usual. RC blurts out the phrase “live to play another day” so now they are just racing to get the pieces they need. Tandang wins by one second so Jeff berates Katie some more. At Kalabaw it is pretty much a given that Katie sucked, even her buddy Dawson agrees but tells her she is not getting voted out and not to be paranoid. Jeff is smart and makes a deal with Denise to be with the three guys and she even gets a five fingered handshake. So much for girl power, we never even see the girls try to hook up with Denise and vote a guy. Like it’s not even an option. Wtf??? So the guys sit around trying to decide between Katie and Dawson basically because Denise is a frikin powerhouse. Carter says Katie, I don’t know what it is about him that reminds me of a cartoon character. It’s like his eyes are too close together or something? Anyway Penner says Dawson. They are all together just lying in the shelter and Dawson goes on hysterically about how she should date an athlete but baseball players just stand around doing nothing and you can just tell Jeff is dying here. She interviews that she likes messing with him and he is like a little mouse she has cornered. Uh oh don’t curse yourself girl. For his part he hasn’t figured out that she knows, but he is leery of her talking sports. So off we go to tribal. There are really no fireworks at tribal. It is all about staying strong as a tribe, weak links, yada yada. Obviously it is Katie or Dawson and nothing at tribal challenges that assumption for anyone I don’t think. The good part comes after the votes are read. First vote Denise, then Dawson, Dawson, Dawson , Dawson. She does look stunned and whispers “wow”. When she goes up to get her torch snuffed the editors make us think she might be contemplating blurting out Jeff’s secret, but she goes in for a hug from Probst instead. HA! Good job editors. In her parting words Dawson says she figured she could have blown him up, but why let’s see if the millionaire can win. BUT he owes her big time and she wants a motorcycle, a helmet, a side-car and a pink gun! Yikes.
  7. Lea I too fear for my beloved Penner. How can he not know he is pissing everyone off already?
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