After the Veto comp...
We come back to Rachel crying (that's new!), because she didn't win PoV. Jeff did! I've tried hating the guy, but I'd still rather have him in the game than Rachel. ff gets confirmation that Shelly is a mister when Rachel apologizes for kicking one of her balls.
Kalia is considering Adam as a replacement, Rachel is still her target.
Kalia tells Lawon that Jeff wasn't her target, she wants him to trust her. Good way to go about it, putting him in a position to leave. She says she'll make up for it by not putting Jordan up in his place. She claims to have thrown Veto to him. Elsewhere, Jeff talks to Jordan about how Kalia screwed up by nominating him, and threatens to go after her if she puts Jordan up as a replacement.
Shelly takes a quick ride on team Rachel and tells her to fight for votes and keep a positive attitude. Rachel mopes away to another room. And continues to mope. For. Ever. The end!
Er. Almost. But First! While Jordan tries to choke down some slop, she and Shelly chat about the veto competition - Jordan's proud of HER MAN, and apparently Rachel's efforts to win were crap. They seem to believe Rachel will come right back if she's evicted. I can only hope the competition is something like "Who doesn't have plastic boobs". Shelly accurately compares talking to Rachel to talking to a toddler.
The hammies get a new grill, which IceManNYR assesses is probably the one from last season. Waste not, want not, I guess. I hope they cleaned it first. Oh, alright, fine. No I don't.
Rachel blathers on to Kalia about the reasons she should stay. She's a bigger target, She won't come after Kalia, she'll target Dani, She'll be coming back into the game if she's evicted, Kalia shouldn't let Dani control her, blah blah etc. Kalia persists that she's playing her own game, and when she mentioned that during the nomination ceremony, it was directed at Dani. I'd bet Dani wrote her nomination speech.
Soon after that, Rachel is outside with Jordan and Shelly, discussing her chances of not going home. Both ladies of them seem to think Rachel doesn't have a prayer.
Adam shreds some coconut to combine with chocolate in a type of dessert for the have nots. While he's doing so, Porsche revelations that she was bullied by Brenchel into playing with them. And now no one wants anything to do with her. She drones on and on about how Rachel was her friend but she's just a phoney. Adam does the nodding and pretending to listen thing, and MrsG makes me choke a little on some apple juice, comparing him to "a third rate wizard in an amateur production of 'Lord of the Rings'".
Shelly and Adam agree that they'd both vote Rachel out. They realize she'll stop at nothing to stay, which includes stepping on either of them if necessary. Shelly's worried that Kalia is having a change of heart about Rachel - She told Shelly that Rachel had some good points about keeping her. However, Porsche and Kalia are hiding from Rachel in the HoH room, and Kalia confirms in a whisper that there's no way she'd keep Rachel. She am pissed that the twist is happening during her HoH, making it potentially pointless. But Kalia, you got to blubber like an idiot on national television. Your HoH reign served it's purpose.
The hammies discuss other uses for coconut, Shelly and Adam try to bribe BB to let them out for a smoke (they're on an indoor lockdown), with promises of good behavior. Rachel mopes around, silently begging for attention by pretending to mourn for herself. No one buys it.
Jeff and Jordan meet with Kalia in the HoH room, Jeff goes on about Kalia's bad move of putting up strong players, because they're the ones to fear. He wants the floaters out, out damn spot. Kalia mentions (again) how she's like, playing for real now and plans to keep it up. She sticks to her story of only nominating Jeff to make sure Rachel would go home, but Jeff isn't sold. He does seem open to the idea of working with Kalia to get rid of the floaters, if she doesn't come after Jordan as the replacement nominee.
Umm. Jeff decides to give Adam a bag of fake scabs for his birthday. Said fake scabs consist of roast beef and vaseline. He wraps his gift in a ...coconut? And, per Jordan's suggestion, uses some kind of silver rope from the competition as the bow. demgirl is pretty sure Jeff's lost it, and I must concur. Jeff gives Adam his present, and is highly entertained by himself, laughing like a madman. Adam identifies it correctly right away, and is pretty excited to receive it.
Jeff and Jordan pep-talk Rachel about her coming back into the game, and how to intimidate Kalia. Meanwhile, the hammies who can eat prepare a feast for Adam's birthday. The lockdown ends, and Adam throws some food on the new/old grill, while Kalia and Dani cook inside, trying to talk strategy but never getting a moment alone.
After feeding, hammies make general, boring chit-chat that is only entertaining thanks to copsister's recapping, and scatter to go to bed just before 5am HT.
Sunday starts pretty slowly.. Rachel whines about [whocares], sir Shelly tries to divert her by asking questions about Brendon. Desperate times. Porsche makes Adam's birthday cake, he declines the ritual cake-battered-spoon licking. They're going to have cake with cupcakes on top..I think. It's reported by angelmi that Adam got permission from the DR for the have nots to eat some of his cake, and I really hope Jordan likes cake.
Lawon finally says something, but it's about being horny and wanting some off-camera time, which does not a pretty picture paint.
Rachel confronts Porsche (ok, my head was elsewhere while typing that, and at first it said "Rachel controls Purple".) in the purple room (see where it came from?) and asks why she's getting the cold shoulder. Porsche sums it up by saying Rachel treated her like shit and went crazy. Not really in that order though, the crazy happened years ago. Rachel woes about how Brendon was torn out of her life. What the fuck. Porsche reminds her that everyone has someone they're missing, but that's not how things work in Rachel-land. Porsche points out that she was still treated like a traitor for talking to Dani even though she gave Brendon her vote. They eventually hug it out, blegh.
Adam shaves / is shaved
Later on, Rachel pityparties to Dani in the HoH room.. Dani is dying her hair, so she has no where to run. Rachel tries to make Dani see the error of her ways, that splitting Rachel and HER MAN up was a horrible thing to do. Dani won't have it though, she got rid of a strong competitor and that's how she plays her game. Rachel crybabies some more about how she has no one and Dani has everyone and even if Rachel comes back into the house after being evicted she'll be all alone. She understands how Dani must have felt during the HoH comp where no one, including Rachel, cheered for her, because it was the same way for Rachel during yesterday's veto comp. Yeah, Rachel. Choke on your own toxic medicine. Rachel wants Dani to agree to play with her if she comes back into the game, but Dani does not commit. Good girl.
Tsy catches a conversation between Kalia and Dani, and it seems they're under the impression that the returning houseguest won't be back to play, just to visit or something. Dani wants to get confirmation from the DR. They're later joined by Porsche, and Kalia confirms to Porsche that she won't be the replacement nominee. She seems to have decided on Adam, because she's not sure how he'll vote.
Outside, Adam tells Jeff he can see good enough reasons for keeping Rachel around. Ahem.
The day is pretty chilled, there are more of the same desperate attempts by Rachel to get votes from various people.. otherwise, hammies are just relaxing around the house and outside, waiting for Adam's birthday party. Trivia, Happy Birthday Adam, and we're back, with Shelly doing the dishes.
Shelly has it out for Porsche. I'm not 100% clear on why, but angelmi mentions that she's tired of Porsche relaying everything she hears to Rachel, and never cleaning up after herself. She works Kalia pretty hard to go for Porsche, claiming that it'd be a good way to regain some of Jeff's trust, since he wants to target floaters. Meaning Rachel would stay? What the fucking fuck, really? Kalia flips her decision for a replacement nom from Adam to Porsche, which pisses Dani off. She doesn't understand why Kalia cares about Jeff and Jordan, and she (Dani) refuses to work with Rachel. Shelly eventually uses this to her advantage, trying to pit Kalia against Dani for her lack of support.
There's some crazily concocted plan by Kalia, which ff does his best to make sense of, but it still makes my brain hurt, and I have no idea what the goal is.. so if you want details, they start here.
In the HoH room, Kalia, Dani, Lawon and Porsche pow-wow. More wondering about the twist and how to play the game around it. The general consensus seems to be to get Rachel out and hope she won't come back. My thoughts since Day 1. ...of last season. Epic Fail.
A bit later, Kalia and Shelly bond outside, over their mutual like of telling Shelly what she wants to hear. AVorlorn points out that this is Kalia's same strategy with every other houseguest.
The only other noteworthy thing that happens before sleepybyebyes is a discussion between Kalia and Shelly RE: Lawon's decision to go on the block since he'll just come back if he's evicted. He does pretty much nothing, constantly, and now he's okay with leaving. Is he really there, or have we collectively imagined him?
Must stop, 1:30 AM HT - Monday. Finished at Post 356